Blog
This blog is focuses on family stories, collecting family stories and the wisdom that comes from paying attention to our family stories.
It includes raw material for my memoir.
Mostly it is additional musings.
Wings, Not Angels–Telling Family Religious Stories
“So what?” “What’s the point?” “And the moral of the story is . . .?” Unfortunately, a lot of people seem to think a story needs to prove a point or why bother. These are usually the same ones who think everything has to be useful, or it’s useless. If you happen to come from a family with a strong religious background, you likely have two problems. 1. That engrained idea that stories have to have morals. 2. A family history so entwined with your religious tradition that there’s no way to...
read more9/11 My Story–Everyone’s Story
We all have a 9/11 story. We know where we were when the terrorists flew into the Twin Towers and forever changed life in America. I was dressing to go exercise with a friend. I happened to have the television on in the bedroom. I hardly left that bedroom for the rest of the day, glued to that television. My husband had flown to Boston the day before–rented a car–was engaged in business. He assumed by Friday when he was scheduled to fly home, the airlines would be flying again. He ended up driving his rental car from Boston to...
read moreLaughter, Wisdom and Story–Same Thing?
Stories give us wisdom which is better than knowledge and more useful than information. In fact, I’ve come to believe that story is the way we capture wisdom and hold onto it. With that in mind, let me share a few thoughts . . . Truth gives us no comfort in time of trouble and no sense of direction. For that, you need good stories about how others handled hard times. Good stories bend the details but always tell the truth. That’s because they’re about larger things. Small people insist on the truth. Those who intend to live...
read moreMy Mother and My Middle Finger
I gave my middle finger to a particularly deserving driver and my mother (sitting in the passenger seat) about had a heart attack. Her generation valued “being a lady.” Mine decided “ladies” don’t get noticed/make history/climb the corporate ladder/etc. etc. . . . you get the idea. As a child, I was not supposed to be dramatic. Drama was for others with fewer manners. That was usually phrased as “a less refined upbringing.” I was to never create a scene. There were better ways to handle...
read moreFamily Stories are #1 Legacy (not money) According to Poll
According to a recent US News report, 86% of the Boomer Generation believes family stories are “very important” and make a more important legacy than money. (see Family Stories, Not Money, Is Best Legacy dated May 21, 2012). The article by Phil Moeller (@PhilMoeller) notes that when people think about their estates and inheritances, they tell pollsters that passing along personal and family values trumps possessions. Generations younger than boomers generally agree. The findings are part of the 2012 Allianz Life American Legacies...
read moreA Story and/or A Flower in A Teapot
This photo makes me smile. I found it in a collection of internet photos. No credit. No explanation. But TEAPOTS filled with flowers decorating a handrail made me stop flipping through the photos and wonder. Who planted these? Who thought to do that with teapots? Now, that’s a person I’d like to know. Talk about making the world a little better. Talk about making a little part of your environment greener. Better than better, flower filled teapots on a handrail make the world more whimsical. Don’t you feel like making up a...
read moreFairy Godmothers, Disney Princesses, and a Big Question
I’ve just finished a book I’m calling PAY ATTENTION TO THE FAIRY GODMOTHER. Title comes from a twist my grandmother gave the ending of the Cinderella story. At the end of that classic tale, she would sit back and say, “The prince is nice. Nothing better than a fine, handsome prince. But YOU pay attention to the fairy godmother; she’s the one who got things done.” Here’s the thing. She was my fairy godmother. She made me feel like I was somebody, a princess, capable of anything. I remember the day I bought...
read moreMothers, Stories, and the Gift Economy
Opened my email this morning and found several suggestions for remembering Mother’s Day–flowers (of course), a BOSE Radio, AirRibs, Godiva chocolates, a Mother’s Wisdom deck of cards (not sure what that is exactly), an Audiobook, and some kind of solar powered dancing flower knickknack. Not going there. With the recession, supporting the consumer economy is not a bad idea. However, I don’t think we talk enough about the gift economy–the things that increase only when we give them away. Love is the obvious example....
read moreWolverines: Why Grownups Need Bedtime Stories
I hiked Glacier National Park last fall, tagging along with Douglas Chadwick, the famed wildlife biologist (see The Wolverine Way). We climbed up and down and all around checking wildflowers and bear sign–great experience That evening, after we’d kicked back in the Granite Chalet, he shared wolverine stories. Chadwick spent seven years studying mountain goats–not an easy gig. Goats go places humans find impossible. But mountain goats, he’d have me believe, were nothing compared to wolverines. It’s literally...
read moreMeta-narrative, no explanation necessary
Saw a bumper sticker at a stoplight today. It said WWJD? I’m not up on my texting terms. Took me a minute–What Would Jesus Do? Our computer-savy dogs are also engaged in a story that can be expressed in a single line–My Dog Ate My Homework. No further explanation needed. Narrative is a coherent system of stories, like Biblical stories or Greek myths. Meta-narrative is an understanding so deeply embedded in the culture that you don’t have to repeat the reference. What would Jesus do? printed on a bumper sticker is...
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